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Who Are You Without The Labels?

 

When I ask my clients, “Who are you if you strip away your titles?”, an inner scramble typically reveals itself.

 

Gosh, who am I if I’m not a director, sister, wife, business owner, friend, mother, aunt, dog mum, and I’m left with little ol’ me?

 

I should know who I am beyond these labels but I don’t.

How does this question make you feel? Who are you at your core?

It's a question that has left me feeling insecure and discouraged way too many times.

 

To be clear, there is nothing wrong with your labels if they fit you and heighten your sense of meaning and purpose. In fact, if that's the case, everything about your labels are right.

 

AND, doesn’t it behoove us to feel a sense of love and belonging without them so our worthiness is enhanced, and not controlled by, these labels?

 

Getting clear about who we are, at our core, so that if we lose a job, change a job, make less money or more money, get divorced, become widowed, can’t have children, don’t get on with our children etc., makes us more resilient and less fearful.

 

Having an identity beyond the labels gives us confidence. It's a north star for when life gets hard and we're navigating change.

 

Today, I stumbled upon an answer that answers the question so perfectly.

 

Who am I when I strip everything away?

 

“I’m lovable because I exist.”

 

Say it with me, “I’m lovable because I exist.”

 

 We forget that we are not the label. We are separate from our labels.

 

We have an essence about us, something that can’t be quantified, and this deep feeling of peace is always with us and available to us, whether or not we know it's there.

 

Thanks to working with coaches and mentors for many years, I know this feeling of peace is with me and in me, no matter what.

 

Richard Dotts, in his book, Dissolve the Problem, says, “The moment I realized that this deep inner peace was always accessible to me no matter the outer circumstances, I understood that I had nothing else to fear.”

 

Without all your labels, take comfort in knowing that you are lovable because you exist.

 

And from that place, your labels become a beautiful addition to who you are. As I shared at the end of Full of Herself, you're the sundae - delicious and whole in your own right. The labels are the cherry on top. If you're wise, you'll choose the labels that align with who you want to be. The ones you don't choose will reveal lessons you'll become grateful for.

 

I hope knowing that you're lovable because you exist and that it's the essence of who you are, brings you clarity. Clarity is the first step in becoming a woman who is full of herself.

 

With Love,

Sarah x

 

p.s. If you're sick of your labels, or you want to do deep some mindset work and take back control of your life, book your free coaching session here.