Boy, did my new coach, Kim, knock my socks off yesterday.
Do you ever struggle with putting up a wall, feeling like you can't show a crack in your armor and feeling a ton of pressure?
Would it be ok if we called this person - ahem me and maybe you, - a perfectionist and a high-performer?
We love to read the room so we don't let anyone down because this creates safety for us. Yet, it's sucking the life out of us.
We look like we have it all together because, by many accounts, we are thriving. But the truth is, we're not thriving. We're struggling to feel worthy and balanced and full of ourselves. We want more and we aren't sure exactly what bumpers to put in place to get clear and focused.
While this might sound a little depressing, there's also the other side of the story. We are full of life. We are confident and successful. It's just that we can do a better job of learning how to let ourselves be human so we can mistakes, suck at something, and feel more free.
Here are two questions I'm thinking about that Kim posed.
1. How can I take back my power?
2. What if I stopped fighting with air?
Let me address question one. I am making myself wrong for my thoughts and feelings way more than I realized. For example, my inner child was having a tantrum about engaging in this coaching relationship with Kim. I was saying things like, "I don't want to do this work. This is going to be hard. I don't want to change. I'm perfectly happy doing it how I'm doing it." Insert petulance. It sounded true but it was all lies. My reaction? My self-talk? What is wrong with me that I'm not excited about this relationship? Why can't I just be grateful and be happy-go-lucky about this new commitment?
This response is a perfect example of making myself wrong for being human and giving my power away to the struggle.
What if I make myself right, in a playful way, for seeing how I want to stay safe, and make it nothing more than that? There's nothing wrong with me because I'm scared. In fact, there's everything right with me because I'm scared. It's a new and unknown adventure. I can take back my power by letting a feeling be a feeling and a circumstance be a circumstance. I don't need to make things so personal and create long drawn-out narratives around them.
Question 2...Kim said, as I was talking through some of my mindset struggles, that she imagined me with a sword in my hand fighting the air.
Ya'll, I laughed so hard. It was just the image I needed to gain some perspective.
Because, truth be told, I don't have any problems at all and I'm inventing them. What a beautiful thing that is to acknowledge. She even said to me, "What if you came up with better quality problems?" Insert another laugh.
I want to behave differently. I want to upgrade my thinking. Not because I'm bad or wrong. But because I'm human and I want to embrace more of my humanity. I deserve it and so do you.
See below for some upcoming events you can be a part of.
I love you,